Too many what if’s

Have you ever woke up in the morning thinking ‘what am I doing with my life?’. If you have, raise your hand.

Just of late I have been contemplating my life, my goals and aspirations. Back when I was at school and studying at college I was so sure of what I wanted to do, so determined; but when I left and started working I thought ‘Is this really what I want to be doing for the rest of my life??’ And in that moment my heart dropped and the world seemed a hole lot smaller than it was before; I felt like everything was closing in on me and there was no where to go. I was trapped. Slowly it began to dawn on me the extent of the decision I have made, why the teachers and my parent always asked ‘Are you sure you want to do this??’, and my mind went into overdrive thinking of all the different possibilities I could have chosen, all the paths I could have took. But I didn’t and now I’m stuck here doing this for the rest of my life, and what if I don’t want to do this? what if I want do something else but I can’t, what if… what if…! My head ran away with my thoughts taking my along with it, on its rollercoaster ride, and soon I found my self in places I shouldn’t be. Somewhere, where I couldn’t get out…

That was until I shouted at myself to stop!… Just stop!

And I did. My thoughts came to a crashing halt and I could again finally think. Process everything and begin to take in my surroundings. I realised I had started to take myself down a dark hole, a road in which I may not have been able to return. However I had made my way to crossroad, each taking me down different paths of my life. Yet again another choice, but one I felt like had control over. Instead of letting my overdrive thoughts take over, I allowed myself time to consider my options, allow myself to take a stroll down each road before making my final decision. However I knew no matter which one I choose, it will be bumpy, bringing forward many hurdles I would have to overcome. But in those moments I learnt, that your never truly stuck, just merely walking dolife quoteswn the road we call life, overcoming hurdles and obstacles thrown our way. We always come to crossroads, our decisions, and we may occasionally take a wrong turn but we always make it out alright.
So remember next time you feel as though you’re trapped, or stuck. You’re not, You always have you’re choices. Look at each one of them, you have time to think. Never let you’re thoughts run away with themselves its a one way road if you do!

 

Until next time,

Yours

Paige xoxo

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